after being injured for most of the season SR Tight End Trevor Young (the 2014 South vs. Southwest MVP) returns to the lineup in time for the last regular season game against Georgia Tech. While not statistically impressive, Trevor remains one of the highest rated TE’s in the nation and also because of his L.A. connections is one of the more popular members of the Crimson Tide. He has been spotted several times with American hero Paris Hilton. Recently Stolenbike Dynasty looted his parents house in Silverlake and uncovered these items
must have took this by accident from his friend in Tucson during SVSW, she is also an american hero
(despite the night vision, its safe for work)
listen to audio for this one
2:25 – loves poor people
1:46 – loves jewish people
0:55 – hahaha this is stuck in my head
0:42: loves black people and what did she do for coke? (the soda?)
for those who witnessed the 2014 Iron Bowl the answer is clear. It was Ali / Frazer the hispanic version as Auburn QB Tommy Castillo and Crimson Tide RB Seth Sanchez went head to head. Both put in career performances, making up for what would otherwise have been a very sloppy game. Auburn had fumblelitis and Marcus Minor looked like a mix of Jarius Jackson and John Navarre —- scrambling and throwing the ball in all places except the Wide Receiver’s hands. But thanks to Sanchez, the Tide found themselves up 21-3 in the 4th quarter.
uno, dos, tres
Castillo then put on the performance of a lifetime. With momentum heavily in favor of the Crimson Tide, the Auburn QB led his team on two 80+ yard drives that would both result in TDs. But Alabama managed to stop a 2 point conversion putting the score at 21-16. And there was no better way to put icing on the cake, than by having Seth Sanchez run in a 51 yard TD, while the team was trying to kill the clock. The hole was there and he went straight for it and we ain’t talkin bout the after party. Castillo was in tears after the game, but Sanchez consoled him and both did a victory lap around the stadium with both the Mexican and American flags, just like they did at last year’s game in Auburn.
Coach Namath’s career record now sits at 99-21 and the next two games will be in Atlanta. Road game at Georgia Tech then the SEC Championships. Bama will either play Tenn, Georgia, & Florida (all have conference records of 6-2) I don’t really know how the tiebreaker works.
p.s. Trevor Young returns from injury for the Georgia Tech game
The following people were mistaken for being illegal immigrants trying to take low paying jobs that normal americans don’t like doing so that normal american can live comfortably, but in reality these people were College Football fans trying to score tickets to the hottest even in the nation
THE 2014 IRON BOWL
The star players from the 2013 Iron Bowl return in Aubrun Senior QBTommy Castillo and Crimson Tide JR RB Seth Sanchez. Auburn is 8-3 an has improved from their 5-7 with Castillo throwing for 2911 yards and 33 TDs, while Seth Sanchez has been the saving grace for the Crimson Tide (9-1 ranked #9) this year. He goes into the Iron Bowl with 1335 yards 15 TDs adding in 21 receptions for 305 yads and 3 TDs. Castillo and Sanchez are not only two of the best players ever in the SEC, they are social icons. Both have huge followings amongst the hispanic american community and have done more for American acceptance of illegal border crossings than Maria, Paco, Maria, Pillar, Maria & Hector could have ever imagined.
other news
- the crimson tide conditioning coach was fired after complaining to coach namath about star DT Jamie Hughes using a cellphone during voluntary workouts.
official school statement:
“The conditioning coach was dismissed on the grounds that he was being a snob and a sellout. It is 2014 and Jamie is too poor to afford an i-phone, hence the reason why he was using a cellphone and secondly the fact that the coach named the workouts “voluntary” suggests that he may bleed Orange instead of Crimson. The Alabama Crimson Tide program will not accept such behaviour”
Sorry this will be a short post. Coach Joe Namath got his 98th career win and Alabama clinched the 2014 SEC West title, but it came ugly. The 17-10 Crimson Tide victory featured only one offensive TD, a pass TD to Mexican American icon Seth Sanchez. The other two TDs came off Fumble recoveries and there was only 3 points scored in the 2nd half. Tide DE Daniel Johnson had the fumble TD and added in 2 sacks, making up for a lackluster performance against Mississippi State in which he was benched.
Key Stats
- Minor 8-20 159 yards 1 TD 2 INTs
- Sanchez 134 yards; 2 REC 36 yards 1 TD
- Wayne 2-45
- Jenkins 7 T
Coach Namath is now 2 wins away from 100 (wow I can’t believe I’ve played that much). Next game is the Iron Bowl against Auburn and after that his 100th victory may come in Atlanta vs. Georgia Tech
whenever I play Miss St. they are usually a C- team with only one or two players above 85, so why then do I always have a tough time against them? Maybe my boys cut Sylvester Croom some slack because he was one of Bear’s favorite players. The 2014 tilt was a near scare. The defence did not show up giving up 41 points and I actually benched several starters because of their poor play. If it weren’t for Seth Sanchez’s 211 yards and 3 TDs I would’ve lost this game. The only bright spot from this game was that several bench player performed well in place of my starters.
during the first half of the 19th century the residents of the state of Tennessee had the repuation of volunteering their services during various wars. Most notably the war of 1812 (vs. Canada ) and the Texas Revolution (vs. Mexico). Of course earning tennessee the title of being………..
drumroll…………
the volunteer state.
On April of 1836, General Sam Houston, with the aid of tennessee volunteers and the battle of cry of “Remember the Alamo”, led Texan forces to a decisive victory over Mexican forces in the Battle of Jacinto. In october of 2013, the volunteer football team of tennnessee would hand San Antonio native (site of the alamo) Terrence Graves and the Crimson Tide, their only loss of the season.
Leading the Crimson Tide charge this year in Knoxville would be Mexican American Seth Sanchez. Now Seth has never read a history book, nor does he intend to, (in fact to him the Alamo is just some car rental service), but he does remember the sad look on Terrence Graves’s face, when they loss to the volunteers; and he did want look bad in front of these tennessee scholars
personal favs of his included
(counting up from 0:00)
0:18 – Southern Belle in white on the left
0:20 – Southern thrash in the middle
0:49 – Southern DMB and A&F fan
ya go vols, rocky top uhhhhh whoops, wtf! drifted off a bit, I mean vols suck, preds suck, norm chow is okay, but ya roll tide. Anyways the Tide came out strong and stayed that way all four quarters. OLB Alex Branch was a beast finishing with 10 tackles, 1 sack, 1 INT & 4 deflections (I think only about 4 tackles were User controlled). Sanchez was his usual self with 159 yards and 1 TD. Well aware of the War of 1812, Canadians FS Clarence Morgan and HB Aaron Perrilloux played well with 8 tackles for Morgan and 1 TD for Perrilloux. All this leading to a 31-13 redemption victory.
seth we love you
key stats
- Minor 10-19 92 yards 2 TDs 3 INTs (but he played good)
- Sanchez 159 yards 1 TD, 3 blondes 1 brunette 1 misc girl (hispanic mojo)
- Wayne 3-34-1
…up next for #10 Alabama (7-1) is Mississippi State, they stink but a lot of recruits are coming to visit.
okay I’ll admit it. I may have overreacted a wee bit regarding Marcus Minor. He is only a Sophmore and after three weak performances in conference games which included an upset loss against South Carolina (I looked back on my previous years and turns out they’ve beat me twice before, cursed!) I was ready to usher in backup Chris Odom as the new starter. Minor signed with Bama as the #1 QB and he was slowly turning into the next Chris Sims or worse Ron Powlus. In fact I was looking for ways to make him transfer in the off-season (put him 4th on the depth chart, convert him to TE, or even cut him), but thank God (the one that visits the Vatican, not the one that visits London, ya I’m talking to all you protestants) that I gave him one last chance against Notre Dame
The #2 ranked Fighting Irish of Notre Dame came into Tuscaloosa not only with the Vatican on their side but a wealth of talent. Nearly everyone on their D was 90+, they had four WRs who were 90+ and their RB Moore would finish with 3 TDs. But third world catholism had a saviour in Mexican RB Seth Sanchez (9-1-5 Mang!); with an injury to Minor that would put him out until the 4th quarter, I felt that it was a blessing in the disguise. Odom performed well, but Bama’s focus was clearly on the ground. By the time the 4th quarter hit, Notre Dame’s LBs figured out how to stop the run. So coach Namath took a chance and put Minor in for the 4th quarter with the Tide down 31-24. He would lead a 95 yard drive that would set up a rushing TD. Score 31-31 with about 2 minutes left. Afterwards the Tide’s D would hold ND leaving about 30 seconds for the Tide to set up the win. With the run not working at all, Sanchez was put into the Slot in the Ace Slot Formation; “FL Middle” was called and Minor, despite huge pressure from the D, came up big and hit Sanchez at ND’s 20 yard line. GWFG was hit by Robert Capps for a 34-31 upset.
(top row: Sanchez takes down ND’s 99 OVR LB; bottom left to right: ND RB Moore was unstoppable, Minor under pressure but completes the throw, Sanchez with the catch to set up the Game Winning FG)
Key Stats
- Minor 9-14 118 yards 0 TDs 1 INT; Odom 5-7 70 yards
- Sanchez 158 yards 1 TD, 3 rec 58 yards
- FB Mark Jones 2 TDs
- Chris Richard 4-46
- Anthony Thomas 99 yard KR TD to start 2nd Half
- SS Chris Christian and FS Clarence Morgan (Calgary) = Sick
- Vancouver Giants pound Prince Albert 4-1 (I was there)
Douchewraps has been all the rage at RPT and were even named the official sponsor of this very blog. However various reports have come in claiming that Arizona Wildcat TE Jeremy Doucette (the so called founder of Douchewraps) stole the idea from Crimson Tide TE Trevor Young.
The wiki entry for Doucette or “Douche” as his teammates call him, claims that he had the idea for it in 2013
2013 due to a major lack of TE’s he has been named starter. He has also taken to wearing full length blue sleeves in all games (even the hot ones). And is planning to market them as “Douche Wraps” for high school players. He has yet to find a venture capitalist willing to support.”source
however there is visual and wikiual (new word I made up) proof that Douche may have taken the idea from L.A. trendsetter Young (pictured above with Paris Hilton); who decided to wear long sleeves in “2012″ because it was cool:
“2012 – In a controversial decision, chose to wear white long sleeves at all times, even in the hot Alabama heat, because it was a cool L.A. thing to do. This angered many conservative Bama fans, but he’s a big hit with the ladies”source
EXHIBIT A
Douche getting worked without sleeves
EXHIBIT B
Young sporting white sleeves in 2012
EXHIBIT C
Young being a “douche” in the 2013 SEC Championships; wearing sleeves
EXHIBIT D
Douche Wraps introduced before 2014 WSU game
EXHIBIT E
these Arizona Wildcat scholars refuse to wear Douche Wraps
EXHIBIT F
Seniors wear Douchewraps in support of Doucette, who lied to them saying he has cancer
sophmore QB marcus minor will start against #2 ranked and undefeated Notre Dame, however coach Namath will not hesitate to take him out in favor of back up Chris Odom. The Kentucky “bootleg” Wildcats jumped out to a 17-0 lead in the 1st quarter as most members of the Crimson Tide came to the game hungover from the previous night. Kentucky superfan Ashley Judd (did you know she was half-Italian?) threw a Bear Bryant appreciation party in celebration of the former Kentucky and Alabama coach. However Marcus Minor had no excues for his poor performance; the strick military man does not drink and choose instead to sleep early and study the melting pot playbook.
The Result……….He had perhaps the worst 1st quarter in the history of my Dynasty, not getting pass the 50 yard line once and throwing an INT. The biggest problem I noticed for Minor the last three games is that when he scrambles he can’t set his feet in time for a perfect throw. So in came Chris Odom, the converted SS who wears #22. Now remember Odom only has a 74 overall rating while Minor has an 87, but in 07, ratings mean very little.
With Odom in, the complexion of the game changed. Everyone from the 3rd string RB to the second string FB was used as the run to pass ratio was about 4 to 1. Odom would only throw the ball 10 times, but with the bootleg Wildcats focused on the run, Odom would turn a playaction or an option pass into a big play. On defense Alex Branch and Steven Mack got over their hangovers and made several important plays. All in all a huge team effort for a 41-31 victory
Schedule doesn’t get any easier for #15 Bama with undefeated Notre Dame at home and then 1 loss Tennessee in Knoxville. The Vols loss to UGA, making the Bulldogs the only remaining undefeated team in the SEC. UGA’s luvin it!
managed to stop a 2 point conversion putting the score at 21-16. And there was no better way to put icing on the cake, than by having Seth Sanchez run in a 51 yard TD, while the team was trying to kill the clock. The hole was there and he went straight for it and we ain’t talkin bout the after party. Castillo was in tears after the game, but Sanchez consoled him and both did a victory lap around the stadium with both the Mexican and American flags, just like they did at last year’s game in Auburn. 
Sorry this will be a short post. Coach Joe Namath got his 98th career win and Alabama clinched the 2014 SEC West title, but it came ugly. The 17-10 Crimson Tide victory featured only one offensive TD, a pass TD to Mexican American icon Seth Sanchez. The other two TDs came off Fumble recoveries and there was only 3 points scored in the 2nd half. Tide DE Daniel Johnson had the fumble TD and added in 2 sacks, making up for a lackluster performance against Mississippi State in which he was benched.
whenever I play Miss St. they are usually a C- team with only one or two players above 85, so why then do I always have a tough time against them? Maybe my boys cut Sylvester Croom some slack because he was one of Bear’s favorite players. The 2014 tilt was a near scare. The defence did not show up giving up 41 points and I actually benched several starters because of their poor play. If it weren’t for Seth Sanchez’s 211 yards and 3 TDs I would’ve lost this game. The only bright spot from this game was that several bench player performed well in place of my starters.
sophmore QB marcus minor will start against #2 ranked and undefeated Notre Dame, however coach Namath will not hesitate to take him out in favor of back up 
